Monday, August 23, 2010

Blogshead Revisited

My recent posting on memorable film titles generated some feedback. Kevin Couch was one of several readers to question the exclusion of director John De Belo’s 1971 cult classic Attack of the Killer Tomatoes! To Kevin I say: This film is very dear to me. I once won a game of Charades due largely to the film. It took my wife all of five seconds to guess the title that I acted out. I do not know what this says about me or the nature of my marriage, but perhaps it is best not to speculate.

Larry Ehmer suggested two titles. The first was the 2006 Samuel L. Jackson vehicle, Snakes on a Plane, directed by David R. Ellis and Lex Halaby, which Larry indicated could be the best title ever. To that I say: I disagree. The title is indeed simple and descriptive, but the best? I think not, particularly in light of Larry’s other suggested title, director J. F. Lawton’s 1989 film Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death. To Larry’s suggestion that this film should have been included in my original list I say: You are correct. It was an inexcusable omission which I will never live down.

The bottom line is that there were many additional titles that could have been included, but were not. To partly remedy this deficiency, I am supplementing my earlier list with the following classics:

The Fable of the Kid Who Shifted His Ideals to Golf and Finally Became a Baseball Fan and Took the Only Known Cure (1916), Director: Unknown. Comment: I know nothing of this film, other than it is listed by as a silent sports comedy written by George Ade. However, with both golf and baseball in its title it fits neatly into this blog.

Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964), Director: Stanley Kubrick. Comment: One of the all-time classics, perhaps the best dark comedy ever filmed.

The Lemon Grove Kids Meet the Monsters (1964), Directors: Peter Balakoff, Ray Dennis Steckler and Ed McWatters. Comment: This is actually three 16 mm shorts, edited together into a single film. The segments’ titles: The Lemon Grove Kid, The Lemon Grove Kids Meet The Green Grasshopper and the Vampire Lady from Outer Space, and Lemon Grove Kids Go Hollywood.

Can Hieronymus Merkin Ever Forget Mercy Humppe and Find True Happiness? (1969), Director: Anthony Newley. Comment: Womanizing, middle-aged director portrays himself as a marionette controlled by an unseen puppet master. All this and Joan Collins, too!

God Was in the West Too, at One Time (1970), Director: Marino Girolami. Comment: Italian film with the tagline “An orgy of bloodletting that very few will survive.”

If Footmen Tire You, What Will Horses Do? (1971), Director: Ron Omond. Comment: Communist infiltrators seek to brainwash Christians, so says the Reverend Estus W. Pirkle.

Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity (1987), Director: Ken Dixon. Comment: The tag line for this film was “Big Movie, Big Production, Big Girls.”

Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the Bride of the Return of the Revenge of the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant, Alien, Flesh Eating, Hellbound, Zombified Living Dead Part 2: In Shocking 2D (1991), Director: James Riffle. Comment: Its sequel was titled Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the Bride of the Return of the Revenge of the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant, Hellbound, Flesh-Eating Sub-Humanoid Zombified Living Dead, Part 3. The inclusion of “sub-humanoid” in the sequel was a nice touch.

Attack of the Flesh Devouring Space Worms from Outer Space (1998), Director: Michael A. Martinez. Comment: Extraterrestrial giant worms in Arkansas.

Biker Babes from Beyond the Grave (1999), Director: Todd Sheets. Comment: The title says it all.

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